As most people know, these blogposts are some time out of sync with the here and now. It has been some time since my last post so that timely is even longer, probably about 18 months as a guess, so this post will be a bit weird as it is a bit of a leap forward in time, despite still being about 8 months in the past. Being a cat I have an ability to flit in and out of my timeline with abandon, but don’t tell anyone else… it is a feline secret.
It all started out as a very odd day. Hooman had had his suspicions for a long time, and knew that something HAD to happen at some point, he just did not know when. It was already odd that I decided to join hooman and the monsters on a walk…
I was joined on the walk by Hooman, The Wally, Snuffles and Lulu. Snuffles and Lulu are another story, and you will be apprised on them at a later date on a ‘need to meow’ basis…
It was later spring, early summer, and the riverside, woods, and fields were in full leafy flourish… The Wally was his usual self rushing backwards and forwards like a lunatic.
Snuffles and Lulu were guests, staying with Hooman for a while. Snuffles was a gentle, shy dog, who liked to trundle along with The Wally, sniffing bushes, and the usual stuff dogs do.
Lulu was a little hairy Diva also staying with Hooman as a guest. She liked to trundle along next to Hooman, and have little darts of speed just to show that she was a vicious monster. We all got on swimmingly, and they all realised that I was in fact the Chief Executive of our little band.
As normal in nice weather, we took our jaunt down to the river, where Hooman had promised me some nice, juicy, hamfish for lunch, IF I managed to catch one. It had been one of those mythical creatures I promised I would feast upon at some point.
The Wally was first over to Pebble Island. The water was not too deep, and he waded across with the same dopey look he always has… I felt it was time to unleash the panther…
It took Hooman some moments to realise that I was also on Pebble Island, although he was convinced I had not come by way of the stepping stones. I had tricked him with my wiley ways, and had crossed ‘elsewhere’.
I was very wet. Hooman assumed, incorrectly, that a panther like myself could somehow loose her footing! Pfft. Stupid hooman. Both Lulu and Snuffles were on the bank, refusing to get their feet wet, yet looking on with great admiration at my superpower.
Hooman and The Wally went back across the river and waited. I could not return without revealing my abilities. After some consternation on my part, I decided that maybe it was time to reveal my superpowers? As someone told Spider-man…
“With great power comes great ham treats” – Someone
With great panther-like power, I leapt…
Hooman was agog. You could tell as his jaw dropped and he looked even more like a slack-jawed yokel. I just walked across the river as though I did not have a care in the world.
I got drenched in the process, but it’s just water off a cat’s back.
So we walked back. lulu had many questions for me as my superpowers, and was wondering how she could gain some of her own. I noted that she was already as fast as the Flash, so probably already had hers.
Later that evening, the second odd thing occurred. I had wondered why hooman had made me a nice little spot inside the house, in the bedroom under the desk, in the quiet. Well, after watching the film ‘Alien’, I had at some point been in contact with a face hugger and gotten pregnant. Whilst this was all new to me, Hooman was chuffed as he wanted a little Numps!
And so, Lester McNumplet was born. The 2nd May, 2016… The sad part is that he was born with a sibling, who unfortunately died a few days later. 😦
Lester grew quick, and was like me in many ways! Both black cats, both clearly vicious apex predators, and both stripes in a certain light. I think I was a good mum.
So, you can catch up with lester and myself on twitter at;
Come and say hi… So, shall be reverting back to my old adventures, and Lester’s life will come around soon enough on the blog!